Journal #1 Spirituality

I was inspired by a dear friend of mine to start blogging again so here goes. Disclaimer though I may go on many a tangent throughout this, because my mind doesn't know what I want to talk about just yet.
To Start, I have gone through so many changes in the past year, Spiritually, and emotionally.

SPIRITUALLY: I don't even know where to began, A year ago I was so on fire for Jesus! I wanted nothing more than to serve The Son and The Father. I wanted to travel the world and spread the Love of Christ. I was reading the Bible everyday and expressing my love of Christ to everyone I met. I was so happy to meet new people and learn about them and care about them  truly It was a high point in my life! I absolutely loved going to church being a part of THE church, Singing Praises to the Almighty OMG Literally one of the best feelings I've had. I even lived with a pastor and his family It was so great, they inspired me in ways I couldn't have imagined. Even their Children inspired me and I saw that beauty that Christ has to offer. But then... I moved back to Bowling Green, and while I was still on fire, While I was Reading and thinking, I realized that I just couldn't love the God of the Bible. He just doesn't appeal to me anymore, I know the arguments for why one should believe in the God of the bible, and why one shouldn't, and for me right now that god isn't for me. I don't agree with a whole lot of what God has done and a whole lot of what is mentioned in the Bible. He just doesn't give me the "fix" I was looking for or even am looking for. Which leaves a large question, what do I believe?
I believe in the power of Love
I believe in the power of Nature
I believe in the power of People
I believe in the power of Hope
I believe in the power of Belief
There doesn't need to be a being that encompasses all of these things. I can believe and practice the love and belief of these things without having to worship someone or something! I had a conversation with my brother  It went a little something like this "You're not Christian anymore?" "no" "Atheist?" "No" "What are you then?" "Do I have to 'be' Anything?" "No I suppose not".
And I think that was a huge thing! People are trying to "be" something whether it is Christian, Buddhist, Atheist, hell or even Agnostic. Like Dammit people If you're going to "be" anything be yourself! Like its totally cool if you're a Christian, or a Buddhist or whatever, I don't care, but don't force it! Nobody should feel like they have to "be" anything or anyone. Believe or don't Believe but please don't feel like you have to believe anything, and that is one of my biggest issues with the way I see Christianity portrayed, They act like it is do or don't LIVE or DIE, There is no middle range, which I just cannot live with. That some of my best friends are condemned because they don't sweat fealty? It's Bullshit. Which is why I have strayed away from that path and am where I am right now.

Next time on Captain Cory's Blog of Truth and Awesomeness
Emotions....
Shit is going to get deep.